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Can we have a hand for Game of Thrones‘ Ser Jaime Lannister? (Yes, there’s a day that joke won’t be...

Game of Thrones Recap: A Stark Shock

By 17:49:00

Can we have a hand for Game of Thrones‘ Ser Jaime Lannister? (Yes, there’s a day that joke won’t be funny anymore, and no, today is not that day.) Fed up with how the High Sparrow has taken over his family and his city, the Kingslayer rides right up to the church creep’s front door — on horseback! — and demands what he wants.

Does he get it? Nope. But there’s an impressive political play going on in King’s Landing, and I’m not talking about the Sparrow’s seemingly successful bid for power. The Lannisters may always pay their debts, but they also know how to choose their moments. And man, I do not want to be the High Sparrow when Cersei decides it’s time.

On an unrelated but near-hyperventilatingly excited note: Uncle Benjen is back! And Edmure Tully is alive! And Sam grew a mighty pair! Read on for the highlights of “Blood of My Blood.”

HOUSE STARK: WARG-WHAT-IS-IT-GOOD-FOR EDITION | We open on Meera dragging Bran through the cold and snow. He’s still warg’d out, tripping around in time and watching everything from his fall from the tower in the series premiere to the Mad King’s command to “Burn ’em all!” with wildfire. The white walkers and wights are in fast pursuit, which he sleepily informs her as he comes to. “I’m so sorry,” she cries, collapsing on top of him, but just then a hooded figure brandishing weapons made of fire arrives and starts taking out young Stark’s attackers. “Come with me, now. The dead don’t rest,” he says, sweeping both Bran and Meera onto his horse’s back and then galloping away to safety.

After they make camp, Meera questions their hooded savior about why he helped them. He says the Three-Eyed Raven has been born again, and then adds a bunch of stuff that helps longtime fans know who he is even before he uncovers his face: It’s Benjen Stark! (If you’re all, “Eh, I just watch this for the boobs. Who is this guy?”: Benjen is Ned’s brother, a Night’s Watch brother who appeared at the very beginning of Season 1 but has long since been thought dead.) Long story short, The Children stopped him from becoming a full-on white walker years ago. He refers to Bran as the three-eyed raven; the teen says he’s not ready. All good, Uncle Benjen replies: By the time the frozen ish really hits the frozen fan, “You will be.”

HOUSE TARWELL | “It’s so green.” That’s Gilly’s take on the lands near Sam’s family’s home, and I remember once more how little of the world she’d seen before the Night’s Watch showed up at Craster’s Keep — and how many insane things she’s witnessed since. Sam is nervous — he reminds her to say that Little Sam is his baby — and Gilly susses out that he hasn’t told his family that she is a wildling.

Sam’s mom and sister are so happy to see him, and they’re very warm to a very out-of-place Gilly. (Side note: Baby Sam might just be the cutest baby in all seven kingdoms.) Later that night, Gilly emerges from her She’s All That-type makeover in a gown and ringlets, to Sam’s great pleasure. “It’s hard to walk in this,” she says, which may be the truest truism (aside from “I drink and I know things”) ever uttered on this show.

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